WHY DO WOMEN DO THAT?
I started asking questions from the girls; I remember a young girl told me “we ladies are not wise that’s why we keep getting deceived” another told me, “we don’t like to face the truth we know, we prefer not to deal with reality, so far the guy keeps up the game” I don’t believe women are not wise, I met a lot of smart ladies smarter than the guys messing around with them.
Matter of fact the two highest IQ's (intelligence quotient) ever recorded (on a standard test) both belong to women. Just that when it comes to this relationship thing most just act in a way I consider dumb.
I also felt that reality is stronger than the pain you suffer because of self delusion I thought the pain is such that should snap you out of it. When it comes to a woman, relationship with the man a good number just seem to loose it, their mind seemed to get suspended and enveloped by blind emotions. I observed
I remember talking to a young lady who had such an aversion for men, I thought it was amusing. You simply dare not tell her you love her or want to go out with her, she goes crazy. I asked her why, she said based on what her sisters and cousin kept telling her about what they were going through in their relationships with guys, she thought they must have lost their minds to put up with such misery. She couldn’t imagine herself going through it. She imagined if she ever said yes to a guy she might loose her mind as well.
I kept asking women questions, never getting a satisfactory answer until I met a mature Christian woman who gave me the most important breakthrough light on the puzzle as to why women give men permission to mess around with them, because a man cannot mess around you without your permission.
wanted to know why a lot of the ladies I met in spite of their intelligence kept acting a dumb when it came to dealing with men. As far as I was concerned it was not that difficult to sift the lies if you really wanted to.
She said “my son any lady that does not have Jesus cannot be wise” that was a breakthrough thought, although it still leaves a lot to be answered, the quest continued.
I spoke to a young woman about the power of a woman’s body over a man’s mind and desire and she compared it to the power of a woman’s desire for relationship with the male.
Later certain issues came up in my Christian walk that will bring the woman question to the fore and I will start asking the right person- God.
As long as I wasn’t born again my relationship with women was clear, the marriage was out of the question, now that I was born again, the issue I thought I had dealt got revived in that my idea about resolving it contradicted the rules of engagement with women as a Christian.
All of a sudden the question of what should be my personal relationship with woman became complicated. Now I couldn’t have a convenient relationship with them based on my terms or rules of engagement.
The rule of engagements now is on God’s terms and that created a inconveniences. Having a “convenient relationship” with a woman out of marriage was out of the question. I thought it’s either I get married and faced what I saw in my family or I don’t and deal with sexual temptations that come from being celebate, as a Christian, my solution of convenient relationship with the woman is no longer feasible.
The problem with this option (marriage) was that apart from the fact that I really couldn’t see any reason why I should pay the price of commitment to maintain a relationship with a lady, Based on my previous experiences with them, women add nothing to a guy as far as I was concerned they just for guys convenience.
Besides judging by what I witnessed in most marriages, and its challenges, marriage is the last thing I want to enter into simply because I want to acquire what I consider a mere convenience. Marriage tended to turn what I call a convenience to an inconvenience. Marriage as far as I was concerned was an inconvenient way and an unreasonable price to pay for a simple convenience.
Secondly there came a strange period in my early Christian life when as it were, there was a ferocious attack of lustful thoughts on my mind. It was hard being around a lady. I began struggling with my faith and my desires.
But my faith was precious to me and no woman was going to take it.
I had experienced women and am experiencing God, the difference was clear. Nothing compares to God. The joy, the peace, the hope, the pleasure, the security etc. No woman ever gave that. No woman is going to take that.
A new hatred for the woman came upon me. As I battled the lusts trying to stay pure, I kept remembering how women have always been the downfall of men who wanted to be holy and concluded they were Satan’s tool to destroy men who truly wanted to be holy and serve God, I thought about poor Samson, David, Solomon and countless others.
So one day on the university campus whilst I was a student, I developed a brilliant idea on how to deal with the woman question, in my heart I told myself I was not going to witness to any woman, I was going avoid them as much as I can and flee every “appearance of evil” to avoid temptation. With the woman around, I thought, it’s not that difficult to recognize evil.
I remembered what someone told me about a belief in his religion that women were gateways for Satan and that they were necessary evil, that each time a man wants to meet with his wife sexually he had to lay his hand on her forehead and say Satan I close the gates you will not enter my life through this gate. I couldn’t agree less, after all Satan got Adam through Eve.
I thought what a wonderful place the world would be with men who truly wanted to serve God, if God had not made “the mistake” of creating the devils ally; the woman. As far as we know, all was fine until Eve came along and now every body is paying.
I remembered a sticker I had seen before becoming a Christian, the sticker read “God created man and rested then He created woman and nobody has rested ever since”, now faced with the struggles within me the content on the sticker came to me with fresh revelation and reality or so I thought. I started thinking of ways to avoid these evil called women.
The problem is, it pretty hard to avoid what you are trying hard to avoid, especially when they constitute the other half of human race, all of a sudden they seemed to be everywhere, I couldn’t believe it women where everywhere! Especially when you were on a campus as I was then.
To deliver myself from these lustful thoughts as a younger Christian, I left the university campus went to a Christian camp and embarked on a three day dry fast. Not eating or drinking for three days just to be delivered from lust.
I thought it was over until I got back to campus and boy, the strong desires was still there. I returned to a Christian camp and embarked on another three days dry fast not eating or drinking anything for three days praying to the developed from temptation; I mean women.
Boy I still wasn’t delivered.
God must have been watching my stupidity and decided to help me. First God made me realized I was the one with the problem; and I didn’t like what God thought about what I was facing, I thought I was the one trying to be holy and solve the woman problem or the problem they were giving me. God made me understand that I was the one that had the problem with lust and I needed to clean my heart. He said;
Titus 1:15 KJV
15 Unto the pure all things are pure: but unto them that are defiled and unbelieving is nothing pure; but even their mind and conscience is defiled.
That I needed to deal with the speck in my eye that made me see women wrongly. Ouch! That was humbling.
I also learnt I needed to stay in the word, and that victory over sin comes by grace and mind renewal all of which comes through a deep relationship with God’s words.
I had a problem and I needed Him to deal with it, there was nothing wrong with the woman. I began to pray for God to renew my mind. The Holy Spirit thought me a prayer “Lord let me see a woman the way you see a woman.
Job asked God
Job 10:4 KJV
4 Hast thou eyes of flesh ? or seest thou as man seeth?
When you see as a man sees you react like a man will
When you see the like God sees you respond like God in purity and love
It’s all in the renewing of the mind and having the mind of Christ.
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